For those of you who were kind enough to read last week's column, the kitten survived. She is thriving and spends a large portion of her days now cuddled up in either my daughter's or my wife's lap. She has begun to explore her new home and build a tentative friendship with our cat and dog.
My wife and daughter are thrilled with her recovery and are glad to welcome another member to our menagerie. Me ... not so much. Do not get me wrong -- I am pleased the cat survived but I must admit I am somewhat suspicious of cats.
Did you know that cats do not meow to communicate with other cats? Cats only meow to communicate with humans.
Is it just coincidence that a cat's meow sounds suspiciously like a child's cry? I think it could be a clever ploy by the felines to impose their will on the unsuspecting humans. Who does not want to help soothe a crying baby by giving them what they want?
Cats are extremely athletic, able to leap an average of 5 feet from a sitting position. This is close to seven times their own height. That would be the equivalent of a human getting up out of bed and leaping 40 feet into the air. Why would something so athletically gifted be comfortable being a pet?
Do cats secretly rule the world?
Think about it. They sleep on average 16-20 hours per day, waking only to bathe and be fed. Occasionally, they will allow their humans to play with them or cuddle with them, but all of this is on their schedule. I would love to be able to sleep all day and wake to a fully prepared meal made by my butler.
If I wanted to play cards, my butler would oblige me. Once I had grown tired of the game, I would simply walk away with no notice leaving the butler to call my name in a futile attempt to get me to return.
Cats do not suffer fools easily. They put up with little nonsense from us puny humans. More time than not a cat will look away in disdain if their human is doing something to annoy them. Much like the kings and queens of old.
My wife brought home a new princess to rule our household with the other existing cat queen. We will serve her as best we can.
I would not classify our dog in the royalty category. Probably more along the lines of the court jester. That is another story for another time.